It's a choice.
Got a little riled in spin yesterday morning. We're all on the bike warming up and it starts..... the instructor shouts out that today is the day she's free of her husband. She used a far more colorful (& cruel) series of names, but it was undeniably him. Let the hatin begin. Another gal starts to talk about her 'ex' as well and it's driving me nuts. "Can't we take this out on the bike" I'm thinking?? It went on and on....I almost left the class. Now I'm not trying to be the proverbial fountain of all that is positive, and by no means am I saying I don't have compassion for them. I do not know what it is like to walk in their shoes, but we all know what it's like to feel deeply hurt. I would even be more understanding if they just needed to vent, but isn't there a point where we turn to a place that allows us to move on, to begin healing, to health. Sometimes our conversations are not a place we find compassion and understanding but dig up & feed the exact anger & hurt we're trying to bury. Strange some seem to relish it. Maybe they don't know how to move on, or just aren't ready. Understand I'm not judging here, just acknowledging the fact that trashing someone will not take away the hurt. Hurting that deep for any length of time is too long. I hope they can begin to move on and rise above it. It's a choice...
It got me thinking about everything we do in regards to training. Carving out insane hours to train, and sometimes waking up @ crazy times to do it. We live lives that both push and respect our physical capabilities. This lifestyle is not an accident. We do our best to rise above our perceived limitations to 'make it happen'. To rise above it all. It makes our little world a lot nicer, don't you think?
It's a choice...
Live passionately!
posted by Deb @ 7:17 PM
9 comments
9 Comments:
Guys do the ex bashing too. I was even guilty when it first happened. To rise above it does make the world ALOT nicer!!
Being positive is a challenge. Being around negative people makes it that much more challenging. I can take a bit of it, then the subject must change, or I just leave.
It doesn't take long for the negative attitudes of one person to infect others.
I bet you could almost feel the life being sucked out of you with all of the negativity in the spin room. I agree that we all need to vent and verbalize our anger and frustration. I just usually do it with a glass of wine in my hand. :-) Exercise is my time to feel POSITIVE and GRATEFUL for what I do have. I'm surprised you didn't walk out!
Hopefully it was part of the healing process, but knowing human nature, they'll be at that same place this time next year if the subject comes up.
Plus, is a public spin class really the place for the leader to do this? Very unprofessional and immature! Go to lunch with 'the girls' and man-bash.
It's a shame when anyone feels that way about any other human being. I grew up thinking my mom hated my dad. They divorced, the hate continued until I saw her crying at his funeral. She said you never stop loving someone once you had that bond with him. I imagine these bitter women might react different if it was death separating them from the men they hate?
Glad to hear you didn't join in on the guy bashing. Guys just want a girl who will workout with them and think they are Superman :-) At least that's what I want LOL!!!
one of my favorite things to remind myself of and advice i will give others is to "take the high road".. it certainly is synonymous with rising above it, so, i completely agree with you.
You are very wise!
When I can remember to act with compassion and love, the world is a much better place to live in!
Whatever happened to growling at your bike? You know: look at your handlebars and go "Grrr!"
Gender-bashing = overrated.
There is no "better" gender. We're all goofy in our own little ways and I'm afraid no one is immune from just being human. ;o)
As for the instructor, that just wasn't right. As stressful as divorce can be, one still needs to obtain a sense of professionalism while leading a class.
No. Matter. What.
Sorry you had to deal with this wall of negativity. *hugs*
Hello Deb, How wise. Complaining is such a bad habit. And we seem to do it all the time. The most scary thing for me, is that in the end, its what we remember most often about a person.
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